i believe in miracles.. and a miracle has happened tonight.

i was watching a really engaging movie - the skin i live in. the movie has one of the very shocking revelations i have seen in a movie. pure scare. gives you a benchmark for the depth of darkness a human mind is capable of.

in parallel, i was watching tv. dd 1 to be specific. bharat ki shaan to be very specific.

you see, when you are watching a movie and are involved in it, you always know when something bad is about to happen. it scares the shit out of me. and tv is my exit strategy. it is my connection to the world - kind of one insanity that protects you from another kind.

so i pause right when i know the worst is about to happen in the movie - its my own version of worst and i need a break before i face it.

this is a music talent show loosely copying new version of saregama. but its better. ismail darbaar is still there but toned down. and there is usha uthup. i like her. and i like the host. manoj tiwari. and i like the participants. and i like the songs they sing. and i like the way they sing it.

the show also has an improvement. a true innovation, they select five persons from general public who judge the participants as well. and yes i love that as well. like and love - difference of a degree. or maybe no difference at all.

but that is enough of introduction already.

so i paused.

and the participants come. to sing. its kind of near the end of season. and the round is really tough. the participants are required to sing without music. very nice round indeed.

the boy comes. sings awaarapan, banjaarapan. quite decent i thought. judges from audience are happy. he gets five stars from them. usha uthup is happy as well. the participant is from usha's team so ismail gets to give stars. he is not very impressed. two judges get into an argument. ismail gives three stars. the participant cries.

i dont see my strategy working. is there no escape? i think.

a break comes. i put tv on the mute.

i unpause the movie. and it happens. shit. i smoke. i kind of try to re-evaluate the happenings in the film in view of the new revelation and i shiver.

but there is more to come.

and i pause.

i unmute the television. the girl comes. she sing 'ae maalik tere bande hum'. i kind of imagine the judges as gods as the lyrics flows in the air.

bada kamjor hai aadmi, abhi laakhon hai ismein kami.
par tu joh khada, hai dayaloo badaa. teri kirpaa se dharti thamee.

but the girl is no lata mangeshkar. and ismail is no god. judges from audience give four and usha gives four. i liked usha. the girl takes it with more grace than the boy did. i like the girl as well. happiness is contagious.

i put tv on the mute during the break.

i play the movie. the worst is about to happen. i hope it does not.

the girl goes down stairs. takes the gun. comes up and shoots him. i feel relaxed. the sound of a gunshot wakes up the 'lady' care taker. she takes her gun and comes up to the room, looks at the dead body, trembles and looks for the girl. what will happen? please don't let it be the movie where everyone is dead in the end. and it doesn't. the girl come out from beneath the bed, shoots and kills her. i feel happy.

the girl visits her mother's shop. she and her assistance look old. the girl loved the assistance and tells her her story. i hope that cops dont come now to arrest the girl for her crimes.

the credits roll.

i feel relieved.

i unmute tv. final participant, a boy, comes. sings 'roop tera mastana'. murders it. the judges from audience give one star. manoj thanks the person who voted for the boy and in the way made the show 'classier' than anything i had seen from tv recently.

ismail gives three star. four stars,in total, seal the fate of the boy. eliminated.

final showdown. all the participants are up the stage. so are the judges. and so is manoj. usha starts crying.

manoj says - usha aap veto ka ishtemaal kar sakti hain. usha nodes in denial. manoj says again but now with a conviction that eludes me forever - ushaji, main chahta hun aap veto ka ishtemaal karein. usha looks at ismail. ismail smiles and says 'bilkul, khusi se'.

and that was how the boy was saved.

and that is how i hope you get saved as well.