God of all Farts!

okk! You dont need to hold your breath. Everything is under control. So 'Fart' has become an integral part of local lingo here. Dont ask about the origin and the 'first reference' as nobody, imho, wub be able to elaborate. So how do I explain 'Fart' to you? AAh!!@#$#$%^%^! I am back to my annoyin self again. One thing that I rediscover almost every other hour is that I just can not indulge into any activity that remotely has any 'learning' value attached to it. Bloggin was fine. Fine, until I started to see it as one of the better ways of spending, sorry, wasting my time. And While right now, I think like I am writing crap, I still feel good, as I see some lines, that will one day take me to the glory. Yupp. I actually think that this blog will be a 'superhit' at some point of time, and people will look at this(these?) shitty post(s?) and say, 'Look, Poot ke paanv paalne mein hee nazar aa jaate hain.' Wow! Life! Is great.

So I was talking about the importance that this word 'Fart' has. If you made a list of important words, I assume it might just land at the second position, right after the f word. So it is like, you say that I scored 20 out of 20 in midsem exams. and I treat you with 'appy'. And then you say, 'I was kidding.'. And I start crying and say, 'Kya fart hai??!'. There are plenty of other examples. And I am here to give you each one of them. Okk! Not each one of them! Happy?!

Well, Fart might be used as an adjective as well. H8 (that's hostal 8) prepared a PAF (that is Performing Art Festival, the one single important thing here, comes close to a 'play' with voice over, but the budget is huge(Around 75k this year) making it possible for us to afford more for sets) last year and we said 'It was a major fart.'. Okk! I was to give an example where it was being used as an adjective. NO, I aint gonna apologies. So all farty things induce the same stinky effect. that comes close to defining it. And I am again bored writing about it.

SO I was planning on watching 'Seinfeld'. Well, the interest was aroused becus of the fact that they say that this is a show about 'Nothingness'. That's damn interesting, right? I want this blog to be like that. About nothingness. And that wud be a hell of a challenging job. Only if I was little more funny(or is it funnier? more funnier??? Wanna shoot me, then yourself?). and little more intelligent! Sigh!

Okk! time to show my 'considerate' side (dont you dare running away!). I have been thinking about 'ego' lately. (God my expressions need this one 'smiley', where I am looking up in the sky (may be standing on the balcony) at a bird (crow?! I always thought that was the one 'daring' bird we had got!) with a kind of astonishment, because it had just tried shitting on me(and that is wen it(crow, of course!) transformed to 'godlike' figure from 'daring' one!), but my sixth sense had helped me dodge it. So in the 'smiley', I am overall happy and cant help but give 'All Happy!' and 'You Bastard!' looks, both at the same time, to that filthy creature.Isnt life just like that? It will shit on you at the bright rainy day wen you thot your life had never been better, but you might be able to avoid it(the shit!) if you are alert and lucky, but again if you got shitted, dont worry, Surf hai na!) one hell of a statement under a bracket!

So I was talking about ego. But I am more into 'shit' part now. So you might have been a total loser, and so lose all your chances of having a girlfriend, to the guy next door. ANyway, just one thing. Oppurtunities are also like gals, buses and naukaries; ek gayee toh doosri aa jaayegi. And that is why patience is importance. And that is why you must go and see 'Pursuit of happyness'. okk! enuf of 'that is why's.

WHats next? I am pretty happy with this post. Some real gyan up there right. And the smiley part was great. okk! BAck to the real world. When I was a kid(not again!), I thot that i sud have been given at least some special power. Yaa, like shaktimaan. But I see people around this world, and more importantly people around me, and the power that they exercise on others. That is the kind of power we all strive for right? I seriously wonder why there is only one shahrukh khan? Or why do soldiers go on a war when the president orders? How do they become so important? And one thing that I think I realise is that.. aah I forgot. Time for dinner.

okk! I have got to write something. so I have been watching this anime for past couple of days. One thing that I have realised about myself is that I have got to be doing something in order to waste my time. Well, first it used to be refreshing Opera for every other second to check replies of the idiotic comments that I used to post. But then the people I read blogs of, are slowly maturing and hence the importance of blog in their lives has drastically come down. Anywho, I thought about going to new places (new blogs in my case) but it just doesnt feel right. Old things are good. You just cant leave them because you have got bored of them. But if we dont make way for change then nothing will evolve. Why is life always an optimization problem?

Okk, So I decided to waste less time on blog. So I started watching 'Bleach'. And man, was it breath-taking! I want to write alot about it but supposedly a lan-ban is going to be imposed from 11 pm onwards. so its a race against time. wel, forget it! I am not competing. So talking of this animation, one thing that I have realised is that people may think that you have a limit, and you will never be able to cross it. But their opinions can always be thrashed. They will not decide the boundaries for you. You can cross your limit the minute you want to. man. I am writing shit now. I sud have rather written about the awesome background score tht it has. or the babes in it. Or the concept. And the awesome way the fightings have been simulated. I am also setting my mind on watching Naruto.

Well. Basanti especial now. I hope tht you have been able to make upto this point. Just watched KWK. yaa KAuf-fee with karan. with soha and saif ali khan. Well if you did watch the episode, tell me why was ms khan being such a laff-slut? and is mr sahid kapur still alive, after saying tht if their relationship did breakup it wud be bcuz of the internal friction??

AAh! I sudnt try it. Its not my thing. you sud write about the damn soap operas. I am in desperate need of one funny post. what possibly can i write about? hopeless.

What do I want to do?

I have finally discovered the truth.

I want to do anything, and not feel idiotic about it.

triple rice!

So I had been to home to celebrate Holi. I was pretty excited, as it was my first trip home after of course securing a decent job. Also, I thot that it had been really long since I had last visited my home. I remembered I had been too early to come back to IIt in summers, on 21st May to be precise, as I had to do this Practical Training (PT). So it had been like 10 months that I had been to home as I didnt visit it during winters, all thanks to placememt activities. Anyway, then I remembered tht I had been to home for Diwali but I cudnt actually recall the details, like where I had celebrated it. My sisters live in Raipur, and my parents live in a gaon named 'Dondi'(remember it as it will be remembered as the gaon where I lived for almost 18 years!). Most probably I had been to Dondi, as it feels like home. And I have never been able to sense any changes in it. Less greenery, may be.

So whats next?! So as I was going home, I looked outside my train window,(which was by the way like a desert, no hariyali whatsoever, if you know what I mean.) I saw loads of 'Palash' trees. Ya, the once, which have this 'flame' red flowers on it.Dont I just love them. They remind me of of my bachpan. I dont really know how. I suppose there was these serial which used to come on DD, when I was still a primary school going child, which showed 'palash ke phool' at the begining. Aah! Wonderful times. How I miss them! They (the flowers) make my heart etch, make me feel like I am missing out something on life. That the most beautiful thing has got to be the pain which one feels for the days gone too far in past. Wow! I was almost a poet back there!

Speaking of the things that remind me of something, 'Dhoop'(the sunshine) reminds me of my gaon. And of my childhood again. Again I dont know why. Everytime I saw it, it reminded me of the place where I belong, more so in my early days out here. Again no idea how! I remember I used to sit outside our home, mainly in winter, and cram up things. How maggu I was back then. Who wud say that I am tht same guy?!?!

Ab aaj joh main senti mode mein ghoos hee gaya hun toh I think I should continue. Ours was a small place. Three rooms to be precise. A typical government employee's quarter. And we were seven. :O . It's really hard to believe now. And we all were quite good with studies. Never went to any tuitions. Well, but then those were the days when going to tuitions was not much in fashion. Well, I am definitely going to send my kids to tuitions though. Well, I know for sure that he wud be smart, what if not as I am, still he wud be ahead of his class, so he wud get to impress the gals in his group with his intelligence. That is what I think is one of the rare advantages of tuition. Why didnt I go to tuition, bhagwaan; why??? You ask why I am crying out this loud??? Well. You sure dint go to an all boys school then.

So as I feel that I have absolutely nothing to talk about my current life, except may be how fucked up it is, I feel wud I ever be able to feel happy for a continuous period of time? I mean I have a decent job, I even got gud marks in one of the courses. But no, I just refuse to be happy. I think happiness is like these points in time, its your responsibility to stretch them and make those points as lines, as long as possible. okk! no fundaes on life no more.

So I was talking about my family. May be one day, I will write a book on them. Each of them so different from each other, still reaching to the same height of greatness.
I know it feels like there is much left unsaid.

ohh! And triple rice. becus I have missed my dinner, and I am planning on eating triple rice from canteen. dont ask me the origin of this word. But it sure tastes good.