I should just shut my trap up. I need more control. I hope the new levels of emotions I feel is not general extension of this losing-my-control phenomenon.

Anyway, should I or should I not? May be I should. The fact that I am thinking twice is a reason good enough.

It's been on very specific occasions that I have written about someone else in my blog.

I know. After almost 4 years with this blog, I have finally made peace with it. And I write this post, with a sense of belongingness that I have with old friends. Like Phaedrus had with his motorcycle I guess.

I am not going to write about blog. I am going to write about my team.
So this team that I work with. Is full of girls. And given that I have been with the company for more than three years, I have a sense of self-righteousness and lack of respect bordering to contempt for political correctness. You know as I write this, I feel like a coward looking out for ways to hide something. shit man. after years of self-evaluation the closest I find myself to is the word cowardice. Not a good feeling but finally I am aware atleast.

So this team of girls, mostly the ones who are junior to me in age and experience. I think I will never tell them that how special they have made me feel at times. (There are boys as well..but lets not waste ink here.) To the levels that I belived for quite sometime that I had a refined sense of humor. The only thing thats stopping me from recounting instances is my own belief that I can not do justice. They are special and I hope they are as happy as I believe them to be.

Anyway, there is this girl. And she seems wise beyond her years. And she is not amongst the one that I talked above about. She is so hot in her own subtle ways. She seems like someone who has got a nice story to tell. I am thinking about asking her out. Only if I did not have this very low self steam, I would already have. I hope I do.