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So, every post must start with a so. And I have been thinking real hard on what to write. Something very witty. Anything too hilarious. And different. And this post is it. It will establish my authority for once and all.

I propose here to tell an adult story. Yaa, you are right when you attach the conventional meaning to the word ‘adult’. You must recognize that the topic is rather interesting. And challenging. You gotta work hard to create humour out of it without offending anyone. And even if one gets offended she (this post is not intended only for the more sophisticated community, it’s just that using ‘she’ is the latest thing in, at least for me!) should find it funny enough to admire the writer of the content.

Now what?! I have tried hard to make an impressive opening statement. But it has sucked right till now. I had thought that all the knowledge that I had gained when I lived in hostel with my computer and free internet and LAN access would come in handy. I had* seen it all. (*have?! But ‘had’ gives that pleasure of sounding mature and old that is very difficult to resist!) Bosses, secretaries, milkmen, Tarzans, working-at-xerox-shop dudes, working-at-xerox-shop-babes, Ms-Indonesias, swimming-pools, night-clubs, shady-apartments, cars, (the-vehicle-that-king khan-used-in-Swadesh)s, disgusting MMSs, disgustingly innovative plots, everything. But now I stare blankly at my monitor’s screen and think about giving up this pursuit of proving-the-authority all together.

One of the innovations that I had intended to implement here was the use of aliases for the ‘must’ words that must be used in any interesting and offending adult estory. ‘Must’ words must be used just as ‘performances’ must be performed. Anybody who has watched ‘Scrubs’ should know what I mean. We could use names of fruits. Mangoes, cauliflower, cucumber, chikus. Healthier, the better. Then we have little difficult ones. Like for the oldest profession from the beginning of human race (Reference needed!), and for the professionals. Okk, its getting too boring now. Where’s the story??

I am really lost here. With this amount of constraint my work-of-art will sound more like any other , extra-ordinarily ordinary love story. And I so don’t want that. Much has been said and written about love. And even I have already given truck-load of gyan on it already. It’s too boring and all the time while you read the story -a love story- you search for those moments of intimacy and when they finally come you are already in love with the characters and hence biased in your critical analysis of the actual content. This post was intended to prove that the sheer power of powerful writing (See!) should be able to hold a reader.

WOW! That was some real shit up there. Any way as you might have rightly guessed I am actually not going to narrate an adult story. It’s not about being scared about being called with interesting names like pervert or nymphomaniac. It’s just that I seriously think that I still believe that I can write one such interesting story. And you gotta admit that idea is good. So this post serves the purpose of a prologue like any sophisticated book and the critics could go through this post to analyze my story thoroughly.

Posted in: on Saturday, September 29, 2007 at at 11:06 AM